My Favorite Place in the World

As if having to spend the day being held hostage at his Institute of Earth Acculturation (school) isn't bad enough, the R.A. also has a teacher come to our house after school.  Obviously he is incredibly thrilled with the extra attention.  This is illustrated by the fact that when the teacher enters the house the R.A. greets her with "Bye, bye" or when he's feeling particularly hospitable a head butt to her legs. 

Prior to the after school visit, the R.A. spends some time in his room decompressing after his long day at the Institute being forced to do various distasteful things such as communicating in earth language, using the toilet for what earthlings intended, learning to wait his turn and other such abhorrent tasks.  No wonder he looks so wiped out when he gets home.  Sometimes the R.A. has had such an "Aye que dia!"* that he puts himself in his room.  As the R.A. drags himself up the stairs he yowls pitifully which I'm sure translates into, "My a#* is dragging!  Those women won't get off my back!"  Some days he's so spent he'll even fall asleep.

The R.A. runs hot and cold with regard to spending time in his room.  Primarily he is fine with it if he has initiated "room time."  It's not unusual for him to dislike "room time" at 3 AM because as the R.A. sees it, he didn't request to be in his room at that time therefore we deserve to be awakened by screeching and wall banging.  Weekday afternoons, however, the R.A. is far more amenable to remaining in his room after school, believing that if he remains in his room he doesn't have to have his session with his after school teacher.  Sometimes when we open his door a small voice says, "No.  No." and then a little hand appears and closes the door.  If it's an afternoon when his teacher is coming we end up hauling him out and by this point the soft "No's" are now several decibels higher.  We then have the added pleasure of wrestling him into a clean Pull Up.  The R.A.'s newest thing is refusing to put his shoes back on after the change.  I finally realized he thinks if he doesn't have shoes on he can't have his afternoon session.  Unfortunately for him we don't have the "No shirt, No shoes, No service" requirement.  This is hardly a formal establishment.

Not one to easily surrender, once changed, the R.A. will bolt out of his room and run into mine where he will jump into my bed and hide under the covers.  (That only fooled me eight or nine times.)  We then engage in a lively debate:

Me: Come downstairs, now.
R.A: No. 
Me: Come downstairs, now.
R.A: No.
Me: Come downstairs, now.
R.A: No.

You get the drift.  Finally I dig him out from the bed clothes and hustle him downstairs.  Sometimes this involves half carrying him while he yowls.  It's very exciting - will we make it down the stairs or won't we? 

This afternoon the R.A. faked me out and ran back up the stairs.  I found him in my room but in a new spot.  It was a new spot but still a familiar favorite.  I found him sitting on top of my mother's commode.**  He was sitting quietly while eating a Pringle and sipping juice, his little legs dangling off the edge.  The R.A. looked very content, an extremely rare sight.  It calmed him down enough that I was able to get him downstairs without much fuss.  He seemed to exude a sense of, "Now I'm ready."

Today, the first word out of the R.A.'s mouth upon seeing his after school teacher was, "Break" as in, "I really need a break."  Part of me understands this as there are some mornings I have to give myself a pep talk to enter my place of employment.  We all have those moments.  Maybe I ought to try some commode sitting.

*One of my mother's expressions.  It means "Oh, what a day!"
**My mother recently had surgery.  We are keeping her commode in a corner of our bedroom until the OT comes to install it in my mom's bathroom.  That is if the R.A. allows it to be moved.